Fred Allen

I don't want to own anything that won't fit into my coffin.

I don't want to own anything that won't fit into my coffin.

All television is children's television.

All television is children's television.

I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

I love deadlines. I especially like the whooshing sound they make as they go flying by.

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to read more

A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognised.

A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can do even better.

A telescope will magnify a star a thousand times, but a good press agent can do even better.