Fran Lebowitz

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.

No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own read more

No animal should ever jump up on the dining room furniture unless absolutely certain that he can hold his own in the conversation."

Having been unpopular in high school is not just cause for book publications.

Having been unpopular in high school is not just cause for book publications.

Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast the disc jockey read more

Radio news is bearable. This is due to the fact that while the news is being broadcast the disc jockey is not allowed to talk.

Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is merely a good read more

Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women it is merely a good excuse not to play football.