Dave Barry

The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting.

The Internet is the most important single development in the history of human communication since the invention of call waiting.

If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.

If it weren't for marriage, men and women would have to fight with total strangers.

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise read more

Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.

Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.

Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.

Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 ft/sec, is a cow that read more

Scientists tell us that the fastest animal on earth, with a top speed of 120 ft/sec, is a cow that has been dropped out of a helicopter.