I was going to write myself in, but I was afraid I'd get shot.
(on his decision not to read more

I was going to write myself in, but I was afraid I'd get shot.
(on his decision not to vote)

I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid.

I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid.

Winning is not everything, but wanting to win is.

Winning is not everything, but wanting to win is.

If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.

If you drink don't drive. Don't even putt.

Use it or lose it.

Use it or lose it.

Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence wins championships.

Talent wins games, but teamwork and intelligence wins championships.

Thou shalt not covet; but tradition approves all forms of competition.

Thou shalt not covet; but tradition approves all forms of competition.

I went through baseball as "a player to be named later.".

I went through baseball as "a player to be named later.".

Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew.

Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is kissing the cox of the Oxford crew.