One player was lost because he broke his nose. How do you go about getting a nose in condition for read more

One player was lost because he broke his nose. How do you go about getting a nose in condition for football?
(asking if the abnormal number of Longhorn injuries this season resulted from poor physical conditioning)

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white read more

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.

I couldn't see the ball come off the club for the first 27 holes. It came off the club that read more

I couldn't see the ball come off the club for the first 27 holes. It came off the club that fast.

How you respond to the challenge in the second half will determine what you become after the game, whether you read more

How you respond to the challenge in the second half will determine what you become after the game, whether you are a winner or a loser.

Are you any relation to your brother Marv?
(spoken to announcer Steve Albert)

Are you any relation to your brother Marv?
(spoken to announcer Steve Albert)

I dunno. I never smoked any Astroturf.
(When asked whether he preferred grass or Astroturf)

I dunno. I never smoked any Astroturf.
(When asked whether he preferred grass or Astroturf)

Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their read more

Golf appeals to the idiot in us and the child. Just how childlike golf players become is proven by their frequent inability to count past five.

There is one word in America that says it all, and that word is, 'You never know.'

There is one word in America that says it all, and that word is, 'You never know.'

We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees.

We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees.