If God wanted women to understand men, football would never have been created.

If God wanted women to understand men, football would never have been created.

I don't care what the tape says. I didn't say it.

I don't care what the tape says. I didn't say it.

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.

Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl.

Men, I want you just thinking of one word all season. One word and one word only: Super Bowl.

The first time I ever saw Arnold Palmer, I said, "There's a star." The first time I saw Jack Nicklaus, read more

The first time I ever saw Arnold Palmer, I said, "There's a star." The first time I saw Jack Nicklaus, I said, "Superstar." I feel the same way about Tiger Woods.

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to read more

If a lot of people gripped a knife and fork the way they do a golf club, they'd starve to death.

It's a nice bonus but, you know, I have to pay taxes too.
(after winning the Grand Slam Cup.)

It's a nice bonus but, you know, I have to pay taxes too.
(after winning the Grand Slam Cup.)

I always turn to the sports page first. The sports page records people's accomplishments; the front page nothing but man's read more

I always turn to the sports page first. The sports page records people's accomplishments; the front page nothing but man's failures.

Other sports play once a week but this sport is with us every day.

Other sports play once a week but this sport is with us every day.