I firmly believe that if the whole materia medica could be sunk
to the bottom of the sea, it read more

I firmly believe that if the whole materia medica could be sunk
to the bottom of the sea, it would be all the better for mankind
and all the worse for the fishes.

Medicine can only cure curable diseases, and then not always.

Medicine can only cure curable diseases, and then not always.

Take a little rum
The less you take the better
Pour it in the lakes
read more

Take a little rum
The less you take the better
Pour it in the lakes
Of Wener or of Wetter.
Dip a spoonful out
And mind you don't get groggy,
Pour it in the lake
Of Winnipissiogie.
Stir the mixture well
Lest it prove inferior,
Then put half a drop
Into Lake Superior.
Every other day
Take a drop in water,
You'll be better soon
Or at least you oughter.

This is the way that physicians mend or end us,
Secundum artem: but although we sneer
In read more

This is the way that physicians mend or end us,
Secundum artem: but although we sneer
In health--when ill, we call them to attend us,
Without the least propensity to jeer.

A physician is nothing but a consoler of the mind.
[Lat., Medicus nihil aliud est quam animi consolatio.]

A physician is nothing but a consoler of the mind.
[Lat., Medicus nihil aliud est quam animi consolatio.]

Medicine makes people ill, mathematics makes them sad, and theology makes them sinful

Medicine makes people ill, mathematics makes them sad, and theology makes them sinful

A sound mind in a sound body is a thing to be prayed for.
[Lat., Orandum est, ut sit read more

A sound mind in a sound body is a thing to be prayed for.
[Lat., Orandum est, ut sit mens sana in corpore sano.]

So liv'd our sires, ere doctors learn'd to kill,
And multiplied with theirs the weekly bill.

So liv'd our sires, ere doctors learn'd to kill,
And multiplied with theirs the weekly bill.

Learn'd he was in medic'nal lore,
For by his side a pouch he wore,
Replete with strange read more

Learn'd he was in medic'nal lore,
For by his side a pouch he wore,
Replete with strange hermetic powder
That wounds nine miles point-blank would solder.