I want to get a job as someone who names kitchen appliances. Toaster, refrigerator, blender.... all you do is say read more

I want to get a job as someone who names kitchen appliances. Toaster, refrigerator, blender.... all you do is say what the shit does, and add "er". I wanna work for the Kitchen Appliance Naming Institute. Hey, what does that do? It keeps shit fresh. Well, that's a fresher....I'm going on break.

How soon 'not now' becomes 'never'.

How soon 'not now' becomes 'never'.

You can't imagine what a pleasure this complete laziness is to me: not a thought in my brain- you might read more

You can't imagine what a pleasure this complete laziness is to me: not a thought in my brain- you might send a ball rolling through it!

Procrastination is suicide on the installment plan.

Procrastination is suicide on the installment plan.

He has a head that is for rent unfurnished.

He has a head that is for rent unfurnished.

It has been said that idleness is the parent of mischief, which is very true; but mischief itself is merely read more

It has been said that idleness is the parent of mischief, which is very true; but mischief itself is merely an attempt to escape from the dreary vacuum of idleness.

The lazy man gets round the sun as quickly as the busy one.

The lazy man gets round the sun as quickly as the busy one.

To do nothing at all is the most difficult thing in the world, the most difficult and the most intellectual.

To do nothing at all is the most difficult thing in the world, the most difficult and the most intellectual.

The lust for comfort, that stealthy thing that enters the house a guest and then becomes a host, and then read more

The lust for comfort, that stealthy thing that enters the house a guest and then becomes a host, and then a master.