A behaviorist is someone who pulls habits out of rats.

A behaviorist is someone who pulls habits out of rats.

Prudent people are very happy; 'tis an exceeding fine thing, that's certain, but I was born without it, and shall read more

Prudent people are very happy; 'tis an exceeding fine thing, that's certain, but I was born without it, and shall retain to my day of Death the Humour of saying what I think. - The Complete Letters of Lady Mary Wortly Montagu.

He who knows others is wise.He who knows himself is enlightened. - Tao Te Ching.

He who knows others is wise.He who knows himself is enlightened. - Tao Te Ching.

Oh, thou hast a damnable iteration, and art indeed able to corrupt a saint. Thou hast done much harm upon read more

Oh, thou hast a damnable iteration, and art indeed able to corrupt a saint. Thou hast done much harm upon me Hal, God forgive thee for it. Before I knew thee Hal, I knew nothing, and now am I, if a man should speak truly, little better than one of the wicked.

A guy ran a red light like at 2AM, got home fine, no police saw him or anything like that. read more

A guy ran a red light like at 2AM, got home fine, no police saw him or anything like that. About 3 weeks later he gets a bill from the police department and a photo of his truck running that light. So, like the smart/dumbass he is, he gets cute, lays out some money on the bed(the price of the ticket), takes a photo of it, and sends it in. So a few weeks pass and he gets another letter, this one has a photo of handcuffs.
He promptly paid the bill.

It's Tommy this, and Tommy that, and 'chuck 'im out, the brute,' But it's 'Savior of his Country,' When the read more

It's Tommy this, and Tommy that, and 'chuck 'im out, the brute,' But it's 'Savior of his Country,' When the guns begin to shoot!

I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad itseems today, life does go on, and it will be read more

I've learned that no matter what happens, or how bad itseems today, life does go on, and it will be better tomorrow. I've learned thatyou can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles these three things:a rainy day, lost luggage, and tangled Christmas tree lights. I've learned thatregardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they'regone from your life. I've learned that making a living is not the same thing asmaking a life. I've learned that life sometimes gives you a second chance. I've learned that you shouldn't go through life with a catcher's mitt on bothhands; you need to be able to throw some things back. I've learned that wheneverI decide something with an open heart, I usually make the right decision. I'velearned that even when I have pains, I don't have to be one. I've learned thatevery day you should reach out and touch someone. People love a warm hug, orjust a friendly pat on the back. I've learned that I still have a lot to learn. I've learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what youdid, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day read more

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.

All autobiography is self-indulgent.

All autobiography is self-indulgent.