It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.

It usually takes me more than three weeks to prepare a good impromptu speech.

'That is indisputable,' was the answer, 'but in this country it is a good thing to kill an admiral from read more

'That is indisputable,' was the answer, 'but in this country it is a good thing to kill an admiral from time to time to encourage the others.'

Writing is like walking in a deserted street. Out of the dust in the street you make a mud pie.

Writing is like walking in a deserted street. Out of the dust in the street you make a mud pie.

I'll publish, right or wrong: / Fools are my theme, let satire be my song.

I'll publish, right or wrong: / Fools are my theme, let satire be my song.

Oh, thou hast a damnable iteration, and art indeed able to corrupt a saint. Thou hast done much harm upon read more

Oh, thou hast a damnable iteration, and art indeed able to corrupt a saint. Thou hast done much harm upon me Hal, God forgive thee for it. Before I knew thee Hal, I knew nothing, and now am I, if a man should speak truly, little better than one of the wicked.

It's Tommy this, and Tommy that, and 'chuck 'im out, the brute,' But it's 'Savior of his Country,' When the read more

It's Tommy this, and Tommy that, and 'chuck 'im out, the brute,' But it's 'Savior of his Country,' When the guns begin to shoot!

A merry Christmas to everybody! A happy New Year to all the world!

A merry Christmas to everybody! A happy New Year to all the world!

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day read more

From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.

I always tell people that I became a writer not because I went to school but because my mother took read more

I always tell people that I became a writer not because I went to school but because my mother took me to the library. I wanted to become a writer so I could see my name in the card catalog.