Rodney Dangerfield

I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it.

I looked up my family tree and found three dogs using it.

My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee.
Unfortunately, she was just coming home.

My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee.
Unfortunately, she was just coming home.

I'm so ugly - My father carries around a picture of the kid who came with his wallet

I'm so ugly - My father carries around a picture of the kid who came with his wallet

I was such an ugly kid - When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up

I was such an ugly kid - When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up

I'm at an age where I think more about food than I do about sex. Last
week I put a read more

I'm at an age where I think more about food than I do about sex. Last
week I put a mirror over my dining room table.