Maxioms by Mitch Hedberg
I was walking down the street with my friend and he said 'I hear music,' as though there's any other read more
I was walking down the street with my friend and he said 'I hear music,' as though there's any other way to take it in. 'You're not special. That's how I receive it too... I tried to taste it, but it did not work.'
My sister wanted to be an actress. She never made it, but she does live in a trailer... so she read more
My sister wanted to be an actress. She never made it, but she does live in a trailer... so she got halfway. She's an actress, she's just never called to the set.
Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over read more
Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over to his house and made sure that he did not start to load his shit into a truck.
I got into an argument with a girlfriend inside of a tent. That's a bad place for an argument, because read more
I got into an argument with a girlfriend inside of a tent. That's a bad place for an argument, because then I tried to walk out and slammed the flap. How are you supposed to express your anger in this situation? Zipper it up really quick?
When someone hands you a flyer, it's like they're saying here you throw this away.
When someone hands you a flyer, it's like they're saying here you throw this away.