Ambrose Bierce

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

Liar: A lawyer with a roving commission.

Liar: A lawyer with a roving commission.

Acquaintance is a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor and obscure, and intimate when he is read more

Acquaintance is a degree of friendship called slight when its object is poor and obscure, and intimate when he is rich and famous.

Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.

Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man - who has no gills.

Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his read more

Telephone, n. An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance.