News Quotes ( 20 - 30 of 33 )
It is good news, worthy of all acceptation, and yet not too good
to be true.
It is good news, worthy of all acceptation, and yet not too good
to be true.
Stay a little and news will find you.
Stay a little and news will find you.
We don't consider ourselves equal opportunity anythings, because that's not - you know, that's the beauty of fake journalism. We read more
We don't consider ourselves equal opportunity anythings, because that's not - you know, that's the beauty of fake journalism. We don't have to - we travel in fake ethics.
The American people deserve to know that they're not just watching the administration's spin on their local newscasts -- they're read more
The American people deserve to know that they're not just watching the administration's spin on their local newscasts -- they're paying for it, too.
Fake news executives are nicer than real news executives, though real news executives are funnier than fake news executives. They read more
Fake news executives are nicer than real news executives, though real news executives are funnier than fake news executives. They don’t know they’re being funny.
. . . by evil report and good report . . .
. . . by evil report and good report . . .
As cold waters to a thirsty soul, so is good news from a far
country.
As cold waters to a thirsty soul, so is good news from a far
country.
The only white man you can trust is a dead white man.
The only white man you can trust is a dead white man.
For me it was just exciting to see fake news catching on like that. We don't… you know, it's interesting. read more
For me it was just exciting to see fake news catching on like that. We don't… you know, it's interesting. I think we don't make things up. We just distill it to, hopefully, its most humorous nugget. And in that sense it seems faked and skewed just because we don't have to be subjective or pretend to be objective. We can just put it out there.
It’s hard to believe that in the greatest democracy in the world, we need legislation to prevent the government from read more
It’s hard to believe that in the greatest democracy in the world, we need legislation to prevent the government from writing and paying for the news.
