Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest -- read more

Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest -- then we can all die laughing.

Great wits are sure to madness near allied,
And thin partitions do their bounds divide.

Great wits are sure to madness near allied,
And thin partitions do their bounds divide.

To be witty is not enough. One must possess sufficient wit to avoid having too much of it.

To be witty is not enough. One must possess sufficient wit to avoid having too much of it.

I am a fool, I know it; and yet, Heaven help me, I'm poor enough
to be a wit.

I am a fool, I know it; and yet, Heaven help me, I'm poor enough
to be a wit.

The next best thing to being witty one's self, is to be able to quote another's wit.

The next best thing to being witty one's self, is to be able to quote another's wit.

Wit, like money, bears an extra value when rung down immediately
it is wanted. Men pay severely who require read more

Wit, like money, bears an extra value when rung down immediately
it is wanted. Men pay severely who require credit.

Ev'n wit's a burthen, when it talks too long.

Ev'n wit's a burthen, when it talks too long.

Wit is far more often a shield than a lance

Wit is far more often a shield than a lance

Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.

Wit has truth in it; wisecracking is simply calisthenics with words.