Sports is the toy department of human life.

Sports is the toy department of human life.

Becoming number one is easier than remaining number one.

Becoming number one is easier than remaining number one.

There are only two kinds of coaches -- those who have been fired, and those who will be fired.

There are only two kinds of coaches -- those who have been fired, and those who will be fired.

I'm a 4-wheel-drive pickup type of guy. So is my wife.

I'm a 4-wheel-drive pickup type of guy. So is my wife.

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.

It's just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.

The only competition worthy a wise man is with himself.

The only competition worthy a wise man is with himself.

Everybody knows that I have been pumping Martin Leslie for a couple of seasons now.

Everybody knows that I have been pumping Martin Leslie for a couple of seasons now.

Football is violence and cold weather and sex and college rye.

Football is violence and cold weather and sex and college rye.

Most skiers are really motorcyclists in cute clothes.

Most skiers are really motorcyclists in cute clothes.