Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, read more

Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill because they pissed me off.

If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia.

If you talk to God, you are praying; if God talks to you, you have schizophrenia.

If a man would follow, today, the teachings of the Old Testament, he would be a criminal. If he would read more

If a man would follow, today, the teachings of the Old Testament, he would be a criminal. If he would follow the teachings of the new, he would be insane.

What men usually ask for when they pray to God is, that two and two may not make four.

What men usually ask for when they pray to God is, that two and two may not make four.

We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another.

We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another.

Our hope of immortality does not come from any religions, but nearly all religions come from that hope.

Our hope of immortality does not come from any religions, but nearly all religions come from that hope.

If someone were to prove to me -- right this minute -- that God, in all his luminousness, exists, it read more

If someone were to prove to me -- right this minute -- that God, in all his luminousness, exists, it wouldn't change a single aspect of my behavior.

If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain.

If I can stop one heart from breaking, I shall not live in vain.

Faith is deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time.

Faith is deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time.