I want to get a job as someone who names kitchen appliances. Toaster, refrigerator, blender.... all you do is say read more

I want to get a job as someone who names kitchen appliances. Toaster, refrigerator, blender.... all you do is say what the shit does, and add "er". I wanna work for the Kitchen Appliance Naming Institute. Hey, what does that do? It keeps shit fresh. Well, that's a fresher....I'm going on break.

My only hobby is laziness, which naturally rules out all others.

My only hobby is laziness, which naturally rules out all others.

Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

Efficiency is intelligent laziness.

Failure is not our only punishment for laziness: there is also the success of others.

Failure is not our only punishment for laziness: there is also the success of others.

Is sloppiness in speech caused by ignorance or apathy? I don't know and I don't care.

Is sloppiness in speech caused by ignorance or apathy? I don't know and I don't care.

Whenever there is a hard job to be done I assign it to a lazy man; he is sure to read more

Whenever there is a hard job to be done I assign it to a lazy man; he is sure to find an easy way of doing it.

My generation's apathy. I'm disgusted with it. I'm disgusted with my own apathy too, for being spineless and not always read more

My generation's apathy. I'm disgusted with it. I'm disgusted with my own apathy too, for being spineless and not always standing up against racism, sexism and all those other -isms the counterculture has been whinning about for years.

Know the true value of time: snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. No idleness, no laziness, no procrastination; read more

Know the true value of time: snatch, seize, and enjoy every moment of it. No idleness, no laziness, no procrastination; never put off till tomorrow what you can do today.

Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over read more

Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over to his house and made sure that he did not start to load his shit into a truck.