Whenever there is a hard job to be done I assign it to a lazy man; he is sure to read more

Whenever there is a hard job to be done I assign it to a lazy man; he is sure to find an easy way of doing it.

He has a head that is for rent unfurnished.

He has a head that is for rent unfurnished.

A lazy person, whatever the talents with which he starts out, have condemned himself to second-rate thoughts, and to second-rate read more

A lazy person, whatever the talents with which he starts out, have condemned himself to second-rate thoughts, and to second-rate friends

Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over read more

Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over to his house and made sure that he did not start to load his shit into a truck.

A great deal of laziness of mind is called liberty of opinion.

A great deal of laziness of mind is called liberty of opinion.

Sloth makes all things difficult, but industry, all things easy. He that rises late must trot all day, and shall read more

Sloth makes all things difficult, but industry, all things easy. He that rises late must trot all day, and shall scarce overtake his business at night, while laziness travels so slowly that poverty soon overtakes him.

It has been said that idleness is the parent of mischief, which is very true; but mischief itself is merely read more

It has been said that idleness is the parent of mischief, which is very true; but mischief itself is merely an attempt to escape from the dreary vacuum of idleness.

I want to get a job as someone who names kitchen appliances. Toaster, refrigerator, blender.... all you do is say read more

I want to get a job as someone who names kitchen appliances. Toaster, refrigerator, blender.... all you do is say what the shit does, and add "er". I wanna work for the Kitchen Appliance Naming Institute. Hey, what does that do? It keeps shit fresh. Well, that's a fresher....I'm going on break.

The lust for comfort, that stealthy thing that enters the house a guest and then becomes a host, and then read more

The lust for comfort, that stealthy thing that enters the house a guest and then becomes a host, and then a master.