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This is it, folks. This is the idea which has kept me virtually unknown for the past 16 years. I read more

This is it, folks. This is the idea which has kept me virtually unknown for the past 16 years. I have watched my crowds dwindle. I am going nowhere, and nowhere quick, but, those of you who have children, I am sorry to tell you this, but they are not special. Wait! I know some of you are going "what, what?" Let me just clarify: I know YOU think they're special ... ha ha ha! I'm aware of that. I'm just here to tell you, that they're NOT! Ha ha ha ha! Sorry. Did you know that every time a guy comes he comes two-hundred million sperm? One out of TWO-HUNDRED MILLION – that load, we're only talking about one load – connected: gee, what are the fucking odds? Do you know what that means? I've wiped nations off've my chest with a grey gymsock. ENTIRE CIVILISATIONS HAVE FLAKED AND CRUSTED IN THE HAIR AROUND MY NAVEL! [...] I've tossed universes in my underpants while napping. Boom! A Milkyway shoots into my jockeyshorts: "Unngh ... what's for fucking breakfast?!"

by Bill Hicks Found in: Humour Quotes,
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The musician who always plays on the same string is laughed at

The musician who always plays on the same string is laughed at

by Horace Found in: Musicians Quotes,
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Feed the musician, and he's out of tune

Feed the musician, and he's out of tune

by George Crabbe Found in: Musicians Quotes,
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Musicians duet better

Musicians duet better

by Britney Spears Found in: Musicians Quotes,
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Let the little fairy in you fly!

Let the little fairy in you fly!

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The poor girl does not know how to have a conversation. Unfortunately, she does know how to speak.

The poor girl does not know how to have a conversation. Unfortunately, she does know how to speak.

by Winston Churchill Found in: Humour Quotes,
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The wise musicians are those who play what they can master

The wise musicians are those who play what they can master

by Duke Ellington Found in: Musicians Quotes,
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There are more bad musicians than there is bad music.

There are more bad musicians than there is bad music.

by Isaac Stern Found in: Musicians Quotes,
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Humour is the weapon of unarmed people: it helps people who are oppressed to smile at the situation that pains read more

Humour is the weapon of unarmed people: it helps people who are oppressed to smile at the situation that pains them.

by Simon Wiesenthal Found in: Humour Quotes,
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