Hollywood amuses me. Holier-than-thou for the public and unholier-than-the-devil in reality

Hollywood amuses me. Holier-than-thou for the public and unholier-than-the-devil in reality

I always try to balance the light with the heavy - a few tears of human spirit in with the read more

I always try to balance the light with the heavy - a few tears of human spirit in with the sequins and the fringes.

I never thought I'd land in pictures with a face like mine.

I never thought I'd land in pictures with a face like mine.

Stop worrying. Hollywood won’t turn your daughter into a nymphomaniac or get her hooked on drugs... I will.

Stop worrying. Hollywood won’t turn your daughter into a nymphomaniac or get her hooked on drugs... I will.

If the career you have chosen has some unexpected inconvenience, console yourself by reflecting that no career is without them.

If the career you have chosen has some unexpected inconvenience, console yourself by reflecting that no career is without them.

I married a German. Every night I dress up as Poland and he invades me.

I married a German. Every night I dress up as Poland and he invades me.

I'm a Hollywood Trainwreck.

I'm a Hollywood Trainwreck.

For an actress to be a success, she must have the face of Venus, the brains of a Minerva, the read more

For an actress to be a success, she must have the face of Venus, the brains of a Minerva, the grace of Terpsichore, the memory of a Macaulay, the figure of Juno, and the hide of a rhinoceros.

Agents are like tires on a car; in order to get anywhere at all, youneed at least four of them, read more

Agents are like tires on a car; in order to get anywhere at all, youneed at least four of them, and they need to be rotated every 5,000 miles.