I'd hate to be a teetotaller. Imagine getting up in the morning and knowing that's as good as you're going read more

I'd hate to be a teetotaller. Imagine getting up in the morning and knowing that's as good as you're going to feel all day.

The only way for a rich man to be healthy is by exercise and abstinence, to live as if he read more

The only way for a rich man to be healthy is by exercise and abstinence, to live as if he were poor.

Subdue your appetites, my dears, and you've conquered human nature.

Subdue your appetites, my dears, and you've conquered human nature.

Always rise from the table with an appetite, and you will never sit down without one.

Always rise from the table with an appetite, and you will never sit down without one.

Abstinence is the surety of temperance

Abstinence is the surety of temperance

Every egg represents 32 hours of jail for a chicken
kept in a 3 ft by 1 ft cage, debeaked.

Every egg represents 32 hours of jail for a chicken
kept in a 3 ft by 1 ft cage, debeaked.

POINT OF VIEW
Thanksgiving dinner's sad and thankless
Christmas dinner's dark and blue
When you stop and try to read more

POINT OF VIEW
Thanksgiving dinner's sad and thankless
Christmas dinner's dark and blue
When you stop and try to see it
From the turkey's point of view.
Sunday dinner isn't sunny
Easter feasts are just bad luck
When you see it from the viewpoint
Of a chicken or a duck.
Oh how I once loved tuna salad
Pork and lobsters, lamb chops too
Till I stopped and looked at dinner
From the dinner's point of view.

All philosophy lies in two words, sustain and abstain.

All philosophy lies in two words, sustain and abstain.

Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder for someone else

Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder for someone else