A diplomat is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually read more

A diplomat is a person who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock.

Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock.

... the patriotic art of lying for one's country.

... the patriotic art of lying for one's country.

I have discovered the art of deceiving diplomats. I speak the truth, and they never believe me.

I have discovered the art of deceiving diplomats. I speak the truth, and they never believe me.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

A real diplomat is one who can cut his neighbor's throat without having his neighbor notice it.

A real diplomat is one who can cut his neighbor's throat without having his neighbor notice it.

A diplomat's life is made up of three ingredients: protocol, Geritol and alcohol.

A diplomat's life is made up of three ingredients: protocol, Geritol and alcohol.

To say nothing, especially when speaking, is half the art of diplomacy.

To say nothing, especially when speaking, is half the art of diplomacy.

A diplomat is a man who remembers a lady's birthday but forgets her age.

A diplomat is a man who remembers a lady's birthday but forgets her age.