Lily Tomlin

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in a library.

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in a library.

We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.

We have reason to believe that man first walked upright to free his hands for masturbation.

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.

Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest -- read more

Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest -- then we can all die laughing.

I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.

I like a teacher who gives you something to take home to think about besides homework.