Ambrose Bierce

Politics is the conduct of public affairs for private advantage.

Politics is the conduct of public affairs for private advantage.

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

Bride: A woman with a fine prospect of happiness behind her.

Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.

Academe, n.: An ancient school where morality and philosophy were taught. Academy, n.: A modern school where football is taught.

A pessimist asked God for relief. "Ah, you wish me to restore your hope and cheerfulness," said God. "No," replied read more

A pessimist asked God for relief. "Ah, you wish me to restore your hope and cheerfulness," said God. "No," replied the petitioner, "I wish you to create something that would justify them." "The world is all created," said God, "but you have overlooked something - the mortality of the optimist.

Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.

Day, n. A period of twenty-four hours, mostly misspent.