If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session read more

If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom read more

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a

The Senate is a place filled with goodwill and good intentions, and if the road to hell is paved with read more

The Senate is a place filled with goodwill and good intentions, and if the road to hell is paved with them, then it's a pretty good detour.

Don't try to go too fast. Learn your job. Don't ever talk until you know what you're talking about.... If read more

Don't try to go too fast. Learn your job. Don't ever talk until you know what you're talking about.... If you want to get along, go along.

One of the standing jokes of Congress is that the new Congressman always spends the first week wondering how he read more

One of the standing jokes of Congress is that the new Congressman always spends the first week wondering how he got there and the rest of the time wondering how the other members got there

A republican stands up in congress and says 'I GOT A REALLY BAD IDEA!!' and the democrat stands up after read more

A republican stands up in congress and says 'I GOT A REALLY BAD IDEA!!' and the democrat stands up after him and says 'AND I CAN MAKE IT SHITTIER!!'

During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet.

During my service in the United States Congress, I took the initiative in creating the Internet.

"Do you pray for the Senators, Dr. Hale?" someone asked the chaplain. "No, I look at the Senators and pray read more

"Do you pray for the Senators, Dr. Hale?" someone asked the chaplain. "No, I look at the Senators and pray for the country.".

Congress is so strange. A man gets up to speak and says nothing. Nobody listens--and then everybody disagrees.

Congress is so strange. A man gets up to speak and says nothing. Nobody listens--and then everybody disagrees.