I just wake up and say, "You're a bum, go do something worthwhile today.".

I just wake up and say, "You're a bum, go do something worthwhile today.".

The world is so fast that there are days when the person who says it can't be done is interrupted read more

The world is so fast that there are days when the person who says it can't be done is interrupted by the person who is doing it.

Life is a sexually transmitted disease.

Life is a sexually transmitted disease.

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow
that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged,
models read more

If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow
that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged,
models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed.

I'm not a genius. I'm just a tremendous bundle of experience.

I'm not a genius. I'm just a tremendous bundle of experience.

The dullard's envy of brilliant men is always assuaged by the suspicion that they will come to a bad end.

The dullard's envy of brilliant men is always assuaged by the suspicion that they will come to a bad end.

There is only one success-to be able to live your life in your own way.

There is only one success-to be able to live your life in your own way.

It is an article of faith in my creed to pick the man who does not take himself seriously, but read more

It is an article of faith in my creed to pick the man who does not take himself seriously, but does take his work seriously.

I cannot give you a formula for success, but I can give you a formula for
failure-which is: Try to read more

I cannot give you a formula for success, but I can give you a formula for
failure-which is: Try to please everybody.