Sermons are like pie-crust, the shorter the better.

Sermons are like pie-crust, the shorter the better.

The Church says that the earth is flat, but I know that it is round, for I have seen the read more

The Church says that the earth is flat, but I know that it is round, for I have seen the shadow on the moon, and I have more faith in a shadow than in the Church.

The biblical account of Noah's Ark and the Flood is perhaps the most implausible story for fundamentalists to defend. Where, read more

The biblical account of Noah's Ark and the Flood is perhaps the most implausible story for fundamentalists to defend. Where, for example, while loading his ark, did Noah find penguins and polar bears in Palestine?

Christ's grave was the birthplace of an indestructible belief that death is vanquished and there is life eternal.

Christ's grave was the birthplace of an indestructible belief that death is vanquished and there is life eternal.

If the truth were known, many sermons are prepared and preached with more regard for the sermon than the souls read more

If the truth were known, many sermons are prepared and preached with more regard for the sermon than the souls of the hearers.

If "everybody knows" such-and-such, then it ain't so, by at least ten thousand to one.

If "everybody knows" such-and-such, then it ain't so, by at least ten thousand to one.

No man ever believes that the Bible means what it says: He is always convinced that it says what he read more

No man ever believes that the Bible means what it says: He is always convinced that it says what he means.

We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another.

We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love one another.

Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?" Priest: "No, not if you read more

Eskimo: "If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?" Priest: "No, not if you did not know." Eskimo: "Then why did you tell me?".