There are three things that can destroy a preacher, the glory, the gold, and the girls.

There are three things that can destroy a preacher, the glory, the gold, and the girls.

Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Give him a religion, and he'll starve to read more

Give a man a fish, and you'll feed him for a day. Give him a religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish.

I still say a church steeple with a lightening rod on top shows a lack of confidence.

I still say a church steeple with a lightening rod on top shows a lack of confidence.

We are convinced that we are true soul mates. When I was fifteen and praying for my future wife, she read more

We are convinced that we are true soul mates. When I was fifteen and praying for my future wife, she was fourteen and praying for her future husband.

Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting if enough angels are unemployed and hanging around the read more

Even a band of angels can turn ugly and start looting if enough angels are unemployed and hanging around the Pearly Gates convinced that all the succubi own all the liquor stores in Heaven.

True penitence condemns to silence. What a man is ready to recall he would be willing to repeat.

True penitence condemns to silence. What a man is ready to recall he would be willing to repeat.

The minister's brain is often the "poor-box" of the church.

The minister's brain is often the "poor-box" of the church.

Oh the depth of both the wisdom and riches of God! How unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways beyond read more

Oh the depth of both the wisdom and riches of God! How unsearchable are his judgments, and his ways beyond understanding.

God hears no more than the heart speaks; and if the heart be dumb, God will certainly be deaf.

God hears no more than the heart speaks; and if the heart be dumb, God will certainly be deaf.