Sermons are like pie-crust, the shorter the better.

Sermons are like pie-crust, the shorter the better.

The people who have really made history are the martyrs.

The people who have really made history are the martyrs.

The Bible may be the truth, but it is not the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

The Bible may be the truth, but it is not the whole truth and nothing but the truth.

It is not so much what you believe in that matters, as the way in which you believe it and read more

It is not so much what you believe in that matters, as the way in which you believe it and proceed to translate that belief into action.

Man will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest.

Man will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest.

If you don't change your beliefs, your life will be like this forever. Is that good news?.

If you don't change your beliefs, your life will be like this forever. Is that good news?.

A lot of people say to me, "Why did you kill Christ?" "I dunno... it was one of those parties, read more

A lot of people say to me, "Why did you kill Christ?" "I dunno... it was one of those parties, got out of hand, you know." "We killed him because he didn't want to become a doctor, that's why we killed him.".

For verily I say unto you, that whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast read more

For verily I say unto you, that whosoever shall say unto this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou cast into the sea; and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe that those things which he saith shall come to pass; he shall have whatsoever he saith.

Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse. Murphy's First Corollary If you tell the boss you read more

Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse. Murphy's First Corollary If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the next morning you will have a flat tire.