God preaches, a noted clergyman,
And the sermon is never long;
So instead of getting to heaven read more

God preaches, a noted clergyman,
And the sermon is never long;
So instead of getting to heaven at last,
I'm going all along.

But in his duty prompt at every call,
He watch'd and wept, he pray'd and felt for all.

But in his duty prompt at every call,
He watch'd and wept, he pray'd and felt for all.

A kick that scarce would move a horse,
May kill a sound divine.

A kick that scarce would move a horse,
May kill a sound divine.

And pulpit, drum ecclesiastic,
Was beat with fist instead of a stick.

And pulpit, drum ecclesiastic,
Was beat with fist instead of a stick.

The priest he merry is, and blithe
Three-quarters of a year,
But oh! it cuts him like read more

The priest he merry is, and blithe
Three-quarters of a year,
But oh! it cuts him like a scythe
When tithing time draws near.

Alas for the unhappy man that is called to stand in the pulpit,
and not give the bread of read more

Alas for the unhappy man that is called to stand in the pulpit,
and not give the bread of life.

The things that mount the rostrum with a skip,
And then skip down again, pronounce a text,
read more

The things that mount the rostrum with a skip,
And then skip down again, pronounce a text,
Cry hem; and reading what they never wrote
Just fifteen minutes, huddle up their work,
And with a well-bred whisper close the scene!

There goes the parson, oh illustrious spark!
And there, scarce less illustrious, goes the clerk.

There goes the parson, oh illustrious spark!
And there, scarce less illustrious, goes the clerk.

I preached as never sure to preach again,
And as a dying man to dying men.

I preached as never sure to preach again,
And as a dying man to dying men.