But we are at war, and we here at THE DAILY SHOW will do our best to keep you informed of any late-breaking...humor we can find. Of course, our show is obviously at a disadvantage compared to the many news sources that we're competing with… at a disadvantage in several respects. For one thing, we are fake. They are not. So in terms of credibility we are, well, oddly enough, actually about even. We're about even.
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News, news, news, my gossiping friends,
I have wonderful news to tell,
A lady by me her read more
News, news, news, my gossiping friends,
I have wonderful news to tell,
A lady by me her compliments sends;
And this is the news from Hell!
For evil news rides post, while good news baits.
For evil news rides post, while good news baits.
We don't consider ourselves equal opportunity anythings, because that's not - you know, that's the beauty of fake journalism. We read more
We don't consider ourselves equal opportunity anythings, because that's not - you know, that's the beauty of fake journalism. We don't have to - we travel in fake ethics.
It is good news, worthy of all acceptation, and yet not too good
to be true.
It is good news, worthy of all acceptation, and yet not too good
to be true.
He's gone, and who knows how may he report
Thy words by adding fuel to the flame?
He's gone, and who knows how may he report
Thy words by adding fuel to the flame?
I am a tiny, neurotic man, standing in the back of the room throwing tomatoes at the chalk board. And read more
I am a tiny, neurotic man, standing in the back of the room throwing tomatoes at the chalk board. And that's really it. And what we do is we come in in the morning and we go, "Did you see that thing last night? Aahh!" And then we spend the next 8 or 9 hours trying to take this and make it into something funny.
Stay a little and news will find you.
Stay a little and news will find you.
Prithee, friend,
Pour out the pack of matter to mine ear,
The good and the bad together: read more
Prithee, friend,
Pour out the pack of matter to mine ear,
The good and the bad together: he's friends with Caesar,
In state of health, thou say'st, and thou say'st, free.
My heart hath one poor string to stay it by,
Which holds but till thy news be uttered,
read more
My heart hath one poor string to stay it by,
Which holds but till thy news be uttered,
And then all this thou seest is but a clod
And module of confounded royalty.
