A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.

All war represents a failure of diplomacy

All war represents a failure of diplomacy

A diplomat these days is nothing but a head-waiter who's allowed to sit down occasionally.

A diplomat these days is nothing but a head-waiter who's allowed to sit down occasionally.

Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot read more

Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot masturbate

Conferences at the top level are always courteous. Name-calling is left to the foreign ministers.

Conferences at the top level are always courteous. Name-calling is left to the foreign ministers.

I never refuse. I contradict. I sometimes forget.

I never refuse. I contradict. I sometimes forget.

Be polite; write diplomatically; even in a declaration of war one observes the rules of politeness.

Be polite; write diplomatically; even in a declaration of war one observes the rules of politeness.

A diplomat's life is made up of three ingredients: protocol, Geritol and alcohol.

A diplomat's life is made up of three ingredients: protocol, Geritol and alcohol.

Diplomacy is to do and say the nastiest things in the nicest way.

Diplomacy is to do and say the nastiest things in the nicest way.