Ambrose Bierce

Miss: A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market. Miss, Misses (Mrs.) read more

Miss: A title with which we brand unmarried women to indicate that they are in the market. Miss, Misses (Mrs.) and Mister (Mr.) are the three most distinctly disagreeable words in the language, in sound and sense. Two are corruptions of Mistress, the other of Master. If we must have them, let us be consistent and give one to the unmarried man. I venture to suggest Mush, abbreviated to MH.

ALLIANCE, n. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's read more

ALLIANCE, n. In international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other's pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.

QUEEN, n. A woman by whom the realm is ruled when there is a king, and through whom it is read more

QUEEN, n. A woman by whom the realm is ruled when there is a king, and through whom it is ruled when there is not.

Tariff: a scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer

Tariff: a scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer

For every man there is something in the vocabulary that would stick to him like a second skin. His enemies read more

For every man there is something in the vocabulary that would stick to him like a second skin. His enemies have only to find it.