I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for.

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for.

In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update would like to remind you: read more

In view of all the deadly computer viruses that have been spreading lately, Weekend Update would like to remind you: when you link up to another computer, you're linking up to every computer that that computer has ever linked up to.

So there he is at last. Man on the moon. The poor magnificent bungler! He can't even get to the read more

So there he is at last. Man on the moon. The poor magnificent bungler! He can't even get to the office without undergoing the agonies of the damned, but give him a little metal, a few chemicals, some wire and twenty or thirty billion dollars and, vroom! there he is, up on a rock a quarter of a million miles up in the sky.

The dedicated physician is constantly striving for a balance between personal, human values, scientific realities and the inevitabilities of God's read more

The dedicated physician is constantly striving for a balance between personal, human values, scientific realities and the inevitabilities of God's will.

We are born at a given moment, in a given place and, like vintage years of wine, we have the read more

We are born at a given moment, in a given place and, like vintage years of wine, we have the qualities of the year and of the season of which we are born. Astrology does not lay claim to anything more.

If you walked into Netscape headquarters with a plain old modem from CompUSA they'd think it was a garage-door opener.

If you walked into Netscape headquarters with a plain old modem from CompUSA they'd think it was a garage-door opener.

Research is the act of going up alleys to see if they are blind.

Research is the act of going up alleys to see if they are blind.

The two best physicians of them all -- Dr. Laughter and Dr. Sleep.

The two best physicians of them all -- Dr. Laughter and Dr. Sleep.

FORTRAN --'the infantile disorder'--, by now nearly 20 years old, is hopelessly inadequate for whatever computer application you have in read more

FORTRAN --'the infantile disorder'--, by now nearly 20 years old, is hopelessly inadequate for whatever computer application you have in mind today: it is now too clumsy, too risky, and too expensive to use.
PL/I --'the fatal disease'-- belongs more to the problem set than to the solution set.
It is practically impossible to teach good programming to students that have had a prior exposure to BASIC: as potential programmers they are mentally mutilated beyond hope of regeneration.
The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offence.
APL is a mistake, carried through to perfection. It is the language of the future for the programming techniques of the past: it creates a new generation of coding bums.