History is a confused heap of facts.

History is a confused heap of facts.

I claim not to have controlled events, but confess plainly that events have controlled me.

I claim not to have controlled events, but confess plainly that events have controlled me.

Wit is the lowest form of humor.

Wit is the lowest form of humor.

The contact with manners then is education; and this Thucydides
appears to assert when he says history is philosophy read more

The contact with manners then is education; and this Thucydides
appears to assert when he says history is philosophy learned from
examples.

Don't brood on what's past, but never forget it either.

Don't brood on what's past, but never forget it either.

I once asked my history teacher how we were expected to learn anything useful from his subject, when it seemed read more

I once asked my history teacher how we were expected to learn anything useful from his subject, when it seemed to me to be nothing but a monotonous and sordid succession of robber baron scumbags devoid of any admirable human qualities. I failed history.

Anyone who knows anything of history knows that great social changes are impossible without feminine upheaval. Social progress can be read more

Anyone who knows anything of history knows that great social changes are impossible without feminine upheaval. Social progress can be measured exactly by the social position of the fair sex, the ugly ones included.

History: An account, mostly false, of events unimportant, which are brought about by rulers mostly knaves, and soldiers mostly fools.

History: An account, mostly false, of events unimportant, which are brought about by rulers mostly knaves, and soldiers mostly fools.

America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone directly from barbarism to degeneration without the usual intervention read more

America is the only nation in history which miraculously has gone directly from barbarism to degeneration without the usual intervention of civilization.