Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, read more

Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to hide the bodies of those people I had to kill because they pissed me off.

If the truth were known, many sermons are prepared and preached with more regard for the sermon than the souls read more

If the truth were known, many sermons are prepared and preached with more regard for the sermon than the souls of the hearers.

One should not stand at the foot of a sick person's bed, because that place is reserved for the guardian read more

One should not stand at the foot of a sick person's bed, because that place is reserved for the guardian angel.

He who loses money loses much; he who loses a friend loses muchmore;
he who loses faith loses all.

He who loses money loses much; he who loses a friend loses muchmore;
he who loses faith loses all.

A religious life is a struggle and not a hymn.

A religious life is a struggle and not a hymn.

Repentance may be old-fashioned, but it is not outdated so long as there is sin.

Repentance may be old-fashioned, but it is not outdated so long as there is sin.

A lot of people say to me, "Why did you kill Christ?" "I dunno... it was one of those parties, read more

A lot of people say to me, "Why did you kill Christ?" "I dunno... it was one of those parties, got out of hand, you know." "We killed him because he didn't want to become a doctor, that's why we killed him.".

From childhood's hour I have not been
As others were; I have not seen
As others saw; I could not read more

From childhood's hour I have not been
As others were; I have not seen
As others saw; I could not bring
My passions from a common spring.
From the same source I have not taken
My sorrow; I could not awaken
My heart to joy at the same tone;
And all I loved, I loved alone.

I feel no need for any other faith than my faith in the kindness of human beings. I am so read more

I feel no need for any other faith than my faith in the kindness of human beings. I am so absorbed in the wonder of earth and the life upon it that I cannot think of heaven and angels.