Sometimes I wonder how I got into comedy at all. I did movie star impressions as a kid in high read more

Sometimes I wonder how I got into comedy at all. I did movie star impressions as a kid in high school. Somehow they just got out of hand.

'Tis said that wrath is the last thing in a man to grow old.

'Tis said that wrath is the last thing in a man to grow old.

With her high pale brow under her faded brown hair, she was like a rock washed clean by years of read more

With her high pale brow under her faded brown hair, she was like a rock washed clean by years of her husband's absences at conventions, dinners, committee meetings or simply at the office.

[Before the officers were sworn to their new ranks, several residents spoke publicly at the meeting about the promotions.] I read more

[Before the officers were sworn to their new ranks, several residents spoke publicly at the meeting about the promotions.] I stand here to say thank you, ... You earned your due. I'm very, very proud of my Police Department in Neptune.

It's risky in a marriage for a man to come home too late, but it can sometimes pose an even read more

It's risky in a marriage for a man to come home too late, but it can sometimes pose an even greater risk if he comes home too early.

The idea of saying we all sit together and agree to share the profit is highly problematic because different groups read more

The idea of saying we all sit together and agree to share the profit is highly problematic because different groups of people will demand a bigger slice of the pie.

I don't think today's younger audience, ... would even know what 1920s musicals were like.

I don't think today's younger audience, ... would even know what 1920s musicals were like.

We all have a general idea of the numbers, but when we reach this point, it is important to have read more

We all have a general idea of the numbers, but when we reach this point, it is important to have a precise idea of the numbers.

This is something of a surprise just because the backlash was so strong last year to reinstate full funding.

This is something of a surprise just because the backlash was so strong last year to reinstate full funding.