If all our misfortunes were laid in one common heap, whence everyone must take an equal portion, most people would read more

If all our misfortunes were laid in one common heap, whence everyone must take an equal portion, most people would be content to take their own and depart.

The man who is too old to learn was probably always too old to learn.

The man who is too old to learn was probably always too old to learn.

Beware of men on airplanes. The minute a man reaches thirty thousand feet, he immediately becomes consumed by distasteful sexual read more

Beware of men on airplanes. The minute a man reaches thirty thousand feet, he immediately becomes consumed by distasteful sexual fantasies which involve doing uncomfortable things in those tiny toilets. These men should not be encouraged, their fantasies are sadly low-rent and unimaginative. Affect an aloof, cool demeanor as soon as any man tries to draw you out. Unless, of course, he's the pilot.

Would ye both eat your cake and have your cake?"This is commonly misquotes as "You can't have you're cake and read more

Would ye both eat your cake and have your cake?"This is commonly misquotes as "You can't have you're cake and eat it, too. - John Heywood's Proverbs, 1546.

Deep down, I'm pretty superficial.

Deep down, I'm pretty superficial.

Tobacco and alcohol, delicious fathers of abiding friendships and fertile reveries.

Tobacco and alcohol, delicious fathers of abiding friendships and fertile reveries.

Wisdom is scar tissue in disguise.

Wisdom is scar tissue in disguise.

Ostentation is the signal flag of hypocrisy.

Ostentation is the signal flag of hypocrisy.

I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.