Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.

Death is life's way of telling you you've been fired.

Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.

Millions long for immortality who do not know what to do with themselves on a rainy Sunday afternoon.

Death cometh soon or late;
And how can man die better
Than facing fearful odds
For the ashes of his read more

Death cometh soon or late;
And how can man die better
Than facing fearful odds
For the ashes of his fathers
And the temples of his gods?.

When I die I want to decompose in a barrel of porter and have it served in all the pubs read more

When I die I want to decompose in a barrel of porter and have it served in all the pubs in Dublin.

Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box.

Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box.

One might say, for example, that a patient has a kind of St Vitus's dance; a kind of dropsy; a read more

One might say, for example, that a patient has a kind of St Vitus's dance; a kind of dropsy; a kind of nerve fever; a kind of ague. One would never say, however (to end once and for all the confusion of these names) "He has St. Vitus's dance," "He has nerve fever," "He has dropsy," "He has ague," since there simply are not any fixed, unchanging diseases to be known by such names.

It's not that life is so short, it's just that you're dead for so long.

It's not that life is so short, it's just that you're dead for so long.

Poverty is the worst form of death.

Poverty is the worst form of death.

At least when you are dead you will know what silence truly sounds like.

At least when you are dead you will know what silence truly sounds like.