Samuel Butler

And as the French we conquer'd once,
Now give us laws for pantaloons,
The length of breeches read more

And as the French we conquer'd once,
Now give us laws for pantaloons,
The length of breeches and the gathers
Port-cannons, periwigs, and feathers.

The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may -make a fool of yourself with him and not only read more

The greatest pleasure of a dog is that you may -make a fool of yourself with him and not only will he not scold you, but he will make a fool of himself too.

'Tis virtue, wit, and worth, and all
That men divine and sacred call;
For what is worth, read more

'Tis virtue, wit, and worth, and all
That men divine and sacred call;
For what is worth, in anything,
But so much money as 't will bring?

Life is the art of drawing sufficent conclusions from insufficient premises.

Life is the art of drawing sufficent conclusions from insufficient premises.

And though it be a two-foot trout,
'Tis with a single hair pulled out.

And though it be a two-foot trout,
'Tis with a single hair pulled out.